halloween - Gaara magara

when you have food, water, and home, and anxiety hits you with the need for protein due to the exhaustion of coffee being digested out, then one starts to realize how empty one is if no one is there, around, to just visit and chat, have something unrelated to think about, then, it hits you back again, questioning the choices done, made, irresponsible behavior for not stepping forward a better possibility of having that, is what it is heavy around. the silence muted by the lack of contact, alienated from any relation, seduced by the impulse of life, knowing about the joys of the world, and doing nothing to find them, as the internal organizations of goals, ina retrospective influence outside the mirrors of detention, prisoner of freedom, you are free as long as you walk this path, the path to those who fear not being free. to move around the emptiness we create, if we don't share our bones, to the grave we dig, as we cover it all, with your joys and lies, as we climb no one notice, just the flames of warms eating those last pieces of flesh done to rot, bodies of lives that are not here anymore, bodies without rights, nor duties, as they left us to be, as they are no longer with us, your mind, your life. it's gone, it's gone! as the souls of those broken in half, by the beast! an animal that crawls, and growls and eats! the same one in your brain, the mind, your mind! being digested by hundred of them! parasites with teeth, and then it all gone, you are rot, no memories nor life! you live cause you are there, alone and forgotten, no soul you have! the reason for all to come an explore, the world is yours no more, you move and it's gone, for more! you want it done and it's yours, your soul is yours, it's back, bone alert, it's done. Backbone alert it's done. for more! your life its yours to rule... Have something to eat, the least i can give you, my spirit is you, work and enjoy. Life is the word and you know, it's your mine and im you. in you. with you, for those who are here, out there, without you, outside, no one seems to care, you are there, alone and beyond! a mind of our own, to move, to turn, another step towards our end, an end, the end. When there is just love to turn to and escape, the core to all in all we are, its time to go, time to go. I'm ready for you, im there for you, as those words are cast, spells or rants, about the world, absurd and the world, the world we are now, is the word, the world, our world, and it's love! in the end is love, no more pain, just the end. Where pain is the air, and the air we breath, we clean, if we speak without words. Something to think, as there is more than think, as we see in the end. Cause you are there, as well as we, that claim to be, existence it is, the word we seek. Another thing to think we exist, forever again, in you, we trust. It is written, it is.

El duende nirvona

Lo encontraba en unas escaleras de algún edificio de mis recuerdos, era de noche y estaba ahí, bebiéndose una cerveza como cualquiera, un joven de pelo castaño claro, grasoso y sucio, con una mirada alegre, en paz, hablando con alguien, otro mas del montón, otro ahí, un duende, un amigo también, un duende saltarin, un duende dantesco, un amigo de los sueños, uno que una vez cuando andábamos aburridos, con otro grupito mas de locos jóvenes de la calle y burbujas de casas y familias con educación y libertades, marchábamos por la calle con algunos bombillos y maderas de por ahi a cantar en marcha nuestra locura como banda nocturna y desafinada, lanzando el bombillo el ayudante del duende, otro loco mas del grupo, salíamos corriendo de tal huevonada como nunca, a grabar nuestras risas en los huecos de nuestra juventud marchita, donde escuchas que los amigos mueren de sobredosis, de enfermedades mentales, de ocio y decidía, en las calles, algunos muerden con perros las sobras que les dejan llevárselas aquellos otros en otra dimensión, separados, unidos, que vaina es esta.

Era un sueño simbólico, a un lado el joven Cobain en su árbol infernal, en otro un duende, un duende. que salta, y salta, para llegar a lo alto, al vació de nuestras risas que son ahora mecanismos circulando la nostalgia de lo que una vez fue libertad, ahora regresas a ser libre, y en sueños rescatado.

for those to label me, or judge me, a therapeutic post

I don't know why I am writing this, maybe it's guilt, or something fabricated, but back when I was in Melbourne, I met a girl that she said, she wanted to live in a castle, and she also said a friend told her, that everything is a castle, so one of my last days i was there, it was a box made one, i made her one when she was sleeping, around her, then i decided to wake her up, so i touched her slightly on her feet. she woke up alerted, of course!, people around thought i was molesting her, idk, at the end i could not even explain it, until now, in this media. damn. tell me about awkwardness.

yet, i am not a role model, so lots of those awkward moments have happened.

every girl i like, i start being nice and all, then i get possessive, and angry. still, that's immaturity with obsession. till today i haven't figured how to deal with it. hoping one day things change. im trying. durp.